TORONTO (Dec. 11) — Want to know something about a colossal amount of money? Talk to a person who handles it. Routinely. Such as Michael Benjamin, third–generation owner of the funeral chapel for which I work.
Not that Michael doesn’t earn it. In his 81st year, he still comes to the chapel every day. And, usually, all day. But, given that Shohei Ohtani collects more in 24 hours than I’ll make in the next two–and–a–half years (nudge, wink, Mr. Benjamin 😛 ), running into the Uber–boss as he ate his lunch on Sunday was rather enlightening.
“It’s crazy, the Dodgers will never make up half that money,” said the owner.
“But, Mr. Benjamin, think of the merchandising opportunities.”
“Big deal. What’s he going to bring in via jersey sales… maybe an extra 10 million dollars? How does that equate to the total amount he’s being paid. The whole thing is insane.”
If it’s “insane” for Michael Benjamin, imagine how it relates to the commoners of this world.
Indeed, the numbers that Ohtani accepted from the Los Angeles Dodgers defy comprehension. They are, in many ways, meaningless. Consider that Ohtani is evidently worth more to the Dodgers than the Vegas Golden Knights or Seattle Kraken were to the National Hockey League. The Japanese star will make $700 million over the next 10 Major League seasons. Las Vegas joined the NHL for an expansion fee of $500 million; Seattle for $650 million.
One player on a baseball team is more expensive than either of the newest hockey franchises.* The Ohtani contract becomes even more absurd when it’s broken into fractions. Here are the pertinent figures (they don’t lie):
*Somehow, Major League Baseball and the Internal Revenue Service have allowed Ohtani to defer all but $2 million of his $70 million annual salary. Which is criminal. The Dodgers will pay the entire freight… but with $680 million being deferred to the years 2034–2043.
FOR THE NEXT DECADE, UNTIL HE IS 39, OHTANI WILL MAKE…
$70 million per year / $5.83 million per month / $1.45 million per week / $207,000 per day / $8,580 per hour.
Given today’s exchange rate of $1.3541 Canadian for each $1.00 American, the above numbers — had Ohtani signed with the Toronto Blue Jays — would equate to: $94,787,000 per year / $7,849,403 per month / $1,964,445 per week / $280,299 per day / $11,679 per hour. Considering that baseball players are paid every two weeks for six months, each of Ohtani’s salary checks (before taxes) will come to $2.9 million USD.
Even Michael Benjamin cannot claim such affluence (though it could be close).
“YOU GOTTA COME PLAY FOR US,” MOOKIE BETTS OF THE DODGERS MIGHT HAVE BEEN SAYING TO SHOHEI OHTANI DURING A GAME, LAST SEASON, AT DODGER STADIUM. JAYNE KAMIN–ONCEA USA TODAY
There is nothing about the Ohtani contract in Los Angeles that equates to logic.
As Mr. Benjamin pointed out, the Dodgers will never be able to compensate for the money they are relinquishing. Now, we learn that at least half the contract will be paid after Ohtani is no longer playing. It is no less ridiculous than Rogers Communications coughing up $5.2 billion (in 2013) for 12 years of national hockey rights on Sportsnet. Here’s a rhyme: Neither Rogers nor the Dodgers stood/stand a fiscal chance. Why the Dodgers felt they needed Ohtani is even more puzzling. Los Angeles and the New York Yankees are the two most–lucrative brands in Major League Baseball. Having made the playoffs in 11 of the past 12 seasons, the Dodgers obtained Ohtani from the neighboring Los Angeles Angels as an expensive publicity stunt. Very expensive. Particularly knowing that Ohtani has now twice undergone Tommy John surgery and will not be able to pitch in 2024.
For the Blue Jays, Ohtani might have been a necessity. For the Dodgers, he’s a luxury.
Also requiring emphasis, particularly after that wacko day last Friday in which too many baseball fans believed they were tracking a private jet containing Ohtani from John Wayne Airport in Orange County, Calif. to Pearson International in Toronto: Only in this part of the world — and with the exception of one inaccurate report out of L.A. — was it believed that Ohtani would choose, razor closely, between the Dodgers and Blue Jays. The Jays were barely mentioned anyplace else as a genuine option for the two–way player. The stout consensus mirrored the end result: Ohtani would remain in southern California and join the Dodgers. Once social media grabs a hold of a story, however, it begins to strongly influence the mainstream media. Thus the sh** show last Friday.
The big gamble for the Blue Jays was not financial, even if it is widely believed the club offered Ohtani in the neighborhood of $600 million (USD) — or $812,460,000 (CAD). Incredible: Nearly $1 billion for a baseball player.
More damaging to Mark Shapiro and Ross Atkins was the notion that the Blue Jays “struck out” on their only viable attempt to improve the team and ignite a tepid, wary fan base. Imagine: Rogers couldn’t find enough petty cash to send Blue Jays radio voice Ben Wagner on the road with the team… then not enough to continue paying him, per year, roughly one–third the amount Ohtani will make each day.
No one said the world was fair. Or, rational.
GOALIE COUNT INFLATES, YET AGAIN
Last Thursday, in Ottawa, Martin Jones (above) became the 78th man to play goal for the Leafs since May 2, 1967, when the club won its most–recent Stanley Cup. Here is the entire roll call (how many can you remember?):
JOHNNY BOWER, BRUCE GAMBLE, AL SMITH, MARV EDWARDS, GERRY McNAMARA, JACQUES PLANTE, BERNIE PARENT, MURRAY McLACHLAN, GORD McRAE, RON LOW, DOUG FAVELL, DUNC WILSON, EDDIE JOHNSTON, PIERRE HAMEL, WAYNE THOMAS,  MIKE PALMATEER, PAUL HARRISON, JIRI CRHA, CURT RIDLEY, VINCENT TREMBLAY, JIM RUTHERFORD, MICHEL (BUNNY) LAROCQUE, BOB PARENT, RICK ST. CROIX, ALLAN BESTER, KEN WREGGET, BRUCE DOWIE, TIM BERNHARDT, DON EDWARDS, JEFF REESE, MARK LaFOREST, PETER ING, DAMIAN RHODES, GRANT FUHR, FELIX POTVIN, RICK WAMSLEY, DARREN PUPPA, DON BEAUPRE, MARCEL COUSINEAU, GLENN HEALY, CURTIS JOSEPH, COREY SCHWAB, TOM BARRASSO, SEBASTIEN CENTOMO, ED BELFOUR, MIKAEL TELLQVIST, TREVOR KIDD, JEAN-SEBASTIAN AUBIN, ANDREW RAYCROFT, SCOTT CLEMMENSEN, VESA TOSKALA, MARTIN GERBER, JUSTIN POGGE, JEAN-SEBASTIEN GIGUERE, JONAS GUSTAVSSON, JOEY MacDONALD, JAMES REIMER, BEN SCRIVENS, JUSSI RYNNAS, JONATHAN BERNIER, DREW MacINTYRE, GARRET SPARKS, FREDERIK ANDERSEN, JHONAS ENROTH, ANTOINE BIBEAU, CURTIS McELHINNEY,  CALVIN PICKARD, MICHAEL HUTCHINSON, KASIMIR KASKISUO, JACK CAMPBELL, DAVID RITTICH, PETER MRAZEK, JOSEPH WOLL, ERIK KALLGREN, MATT MURRAY, ILYA SAMSONOV, JETT ALEXANDER, MARTIN JONES.
MORE NHL EXPANSION JERSEYS
In my collection, the original home jersey designs, in 1967–68, of the Pittsburgh Penguins (above) and the Minnesota North Stars. After that inaugural expansion season, the Penguins affixed their logo on the jersey front, replacing the diagonal “PITTSBURGH”. The North Stars logo stayed essentially the same throughout the club’s 26–year history in Bloomington, Minnesota.
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